April, Spring. Conjures up pictures of spring lambs lolling in sun kissed meadows, banks of golden daffodils basking in some early sun, a bit of spring cleaning in the garden and leaving the back door open for some fresh air...nope. Winter was back with a vengeance this morning. I woke up this morning to a blanket of snow, a blizzard wind and swirling snow.
The car is snowed in and going no where early and where I currently am, Northowram, there are abandoned cars and telegraph wires brought down by the weight of the snow. What strange weather we are having. It was only last week I was wearing shorts and t-shirt.
Well With the weather comes travel disruption and work have been called to say I'm working from home today so the toaster is on, the coffee brewing and the biscuits broken out ;)
As I sit here and type this and look out of the window to my left, all I can see is a 'white out'..across many miles of fields to the far horizon. Although it is predicted to be only a short spell of snow it has had it's usual effect on the transport system and effectiveness of the British to cope. On the road out of this village there are two stuck articulated lorries and numerous abondened cars. Sometimes simple intelligence tells you a two wheel drive motor is going no where but you can only end up blocking the road for others. The usual 4*4 drivers are out.."look at me look at me in my 4*4, get out of my way plebs in your little plebby cars you're holding me up. Don't you know who I am?? Ihave a 4*4 and are thus considerably far more richer than yow!"
This is the first in my working life that I've not made it to work in my working life so I'm going to fully enjoy it.
Right, the sausages need turning...laters!
UPDATE:
The sausages were great!
I manfully battled through the Arctic North and arrived at work just before mid day. What a hero! (said my boss!). The southern softies will still be sat at home sipping hot chocolate and dipping rich tea biscuits, waltzing about in their moccasin loafers, facebooking their 'friends' at how they are trapped in a wintry wilderness (half an inch of melting slush) and Tarquin want's to go build a snowman but they can't possibly go outside whilst it's so cold and inhospitable, I mean, after all they have no sherpas to roll the snow for the snowman and Jeremy Kyle is on in ten minutes
Benefit Britain won't even know it's snowed today as it will have melted before they get out of their pit. Mr Salesman will have contributed to about 30 road related accidents from speeding and crawling up the backside of other motorists as they are oblivious to the weather conditions and are suddenly suprised that their BMW (always BMW drivers!) suddenly won't brake to a stop in 5 yards..
The same people that have abandoned their cars at the side of the road will be the same people that moan about the lack of gritters, the same gritters that can't grit the road because some idiots have abandoned their cars on them...
The trains awill be delayed because it is the wrong kind of snow ...causing signal failures and points failures which makes a nice change from delays caused by cable theft
The buses won't run because of 'Elf and safety'..."can't drive down their mate, elf and safety..bus might skid"
The Hyacinth Bouquets of the world are out and about holding up the British working man by doing 5mph down the road with a tail back behind them. They've failed to notice that the snow has been ploughed to the side of the road, the road surface is just wet and the temperature above freezing - stay at home and do some crochet!
Joggers - hate them even more today. There's snow on the paths so apparantly it gives them the right to run on the road. But there is snow in the gutters and the first yard into the road so they think they can run in the middle of the road?!!? Tell you what morons, have a day off! The last one apparantly didn't take too kindly to a blast of the horn lol
Laters
..... and they'll all have their sodding rear fog lights on so they can be seen 5 feet in front of you!! Pedro
ReplyDelete